In search of authenticity: singles are fed up with perfect profiles

The dating industry is experiencing a noticeable shift away from what, just five years ago, seemed to be its greatest achievement — the endless optimisation of profiles. Industry research over the past year has identified a consistent demand from users, regardless of age: the overwhelming majority of single people want their profiles – and the platforms themselves – to reflect their true selves, rather than a curated version of themselves. This desire for authenticity is gradually changing both how people meet and which services they choose.

Disillusionment with the polished image

Years of using dating apps have accustomed users to a certain ritual: selecting the best photos, writing a witty bio, and rehearsing their first messages. The result is fatigue with their own performativity. People admit that they expend energy maintaining an image that bears little resemblance to who they really are, and then face disappointment when a face-to-face meeting fails to live up to the expectations created by a perfect profile.

This disappointment manifests itself in several notable trends:

• A return to matchmakers. Professional matchmakers and dating agencies are enjoying a resurgence in popularity – many people are willing to pay to have a human, rather than an algorithm, filter potential partners.
• Parents getting involved in finding partners for their children. Increasingly, the older generation are turning to matchmaking consultants themselves, seeking to help their children adopt a more conscious approach to relationships.
• Scepticism towards platforms. Users are demanding greater transparency from services — identity verification, fair matching algorithms, and an end to artificially retaining attention for the sake of engagement metrics.
• A re-evaluation of the very concept of “relationships”. Rigid frameworks are giving way to more flexible arrangements — ranging from partnerships without clear commitments to open discussions about expectations right from the start of a relationship.

Why authenticity has become the key currency

The reason for this shift is simple: the more decisions in a person’s life are automated by algorithms, the stronger the demand becomes for something genuine — be it a live conversation, an honest reaction or a spontaneous, unscripted meeting. Experts in user behaviour note that the modern dater is not tired of the very idea of looking for a partner, but of the intermediary layer that turns getting to know someone into a game for attention.

This is precisely why the formats that enjoy the greatest trust today are those where there is less room for pretence:

1. Face-to-face meetings outside the context of a “date” – shared activities, interest-based events, chance encounters through friends.
2. Voice and video calls before meeting in person, which allow you to quickly gauge genuine chemistry.
3. Platforms with a minimum of filters and maximum transparency regarding the other person’s identity.
4. Formats without lengthy messaging, where decisions are made based on a live impression rather than text.

Live contact in the Monkey app as a counterbalance to filtered reality

It is against this backdrop that video services built around spontaneity, rather than a curated image, are gaining popularity. One example is Monkey, a random video chat that connects strangers for a live conversation without the need for a preliminary profile or lengthy messaging.

The logic behind online videochats such as Monkey is the exact opposite of that of a traditional dating app: instead of first assessing text and photos, and only then moving on to a conversation, the user immediately sees and hears their conversation partner. There is simply no scope here for a carefully crafted image — reactions, facial expressions and manner of speech are visible from the very first second. For an audience tired of the disconnect between profile and reality, Monkey app sign up feels like a more honest format: fewer expectations, fewer disappointments, more spontaneity.

The random nature of online chat connections also takes some of the pressure off: if the conversation doesn’t go well, you can simply move on to the next person without spending weeks trying to work out whether the chat was genuine.

Where is the industry heading?

The trend towards authenticity isn’t a rejection of technology, but a demand that it act as a more honest intermediary. Platforms that can reduce the degree of artificiality in the dating process — whether through live video chat, the involvement of professional curators or transparent moderation rules — will gain an advantage over services that continue to rely on endless profile optimization.

Singles have not lost faith in the very idea of seeking a relationship. They have become disillusioned with the mediated nature of the process and are increasingly seeking more direct ways to see another person as a real conversational partner, rather than a carefully edited version of themselves. And judging by how rapidly demand for formats of live, unscripted communication is growing, this trend is set to intensify in the coming years, forcing the entire dating industry to rethink its traditional approaches to what is generally considered a successful match.

It is telling that the demand for authenticity is emerging simultaneously from both the bottom up and the top down: users themselves are demanding less staging, whilst platforms seeking to retain their audience are beginning to compete not on the number of features, but on the degree of trust they are able to inspire. In this sense, live video chats are proving not to be a passing fad, but a logical response to an entire generation’s fatigue with mediated, filtered interaction. The more transparent and spontaneous the initial contact between people becomes, the greater the likelihood that it will be followed by a genuinely meaningful continuation — be it an offline meeting, a long video call or simply a pleasant acquaintance without any obligations or unrealistic expectations.